Smart ways to gain trust from your partner

 

For any relationship to thrive, trust is pivotal.  It is an important part of the foundation of every healthy relationship. In fact, without trust, there is no healthy relationship.

Some might actually be wondering what this "Trust" means. Could that be you? Don't worry. Let me take you through the meaning of trust first: It is generally the act of placing confidence and being able to depend on someone or something.

Let me add that trust is the foundation of every relationship from which a strong connection can be built. Without trust between couples, relationships won’t grow and progress to a deeper level. It brings better understanding and mutual respect. More so, it makes the relationship stronger, where both people can come together without being afraid of judgment.

Most times, when people hear the word "trust", they think it's one person's (one partner's) responsibility. Hell NO! Yea, you heard me!! It doesn't work that way!!!

 The very moment you start lying to your partner, you've unknowingly started destroying the trust- bond between you two. Partners must keep their words and promises in order to improve trust.

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Pause for a second and answer this question- Are you sure there is trust existing between you and your partner? It's true that some people may not even know if they lost trust in their relationship long ago. Quickly, let me take you through the various signs that may point to mistrust in the relationship.

1. Isolation or separation from your partner

When I mention separation, I do not only mean physical isolation or separation. Of course, one can be emotionally separated from the other. Following fear of commitment to untrusted partner. You may possibly withdraw gradually, to a point that he or she doesn't make the relationship a priority.

2. Less commitment.

People with trust issues often commit less to their relationship. This happens most times as a result of the fact that they don't want to be hurt. Especially the ladies, they do not want to give their heart to someone who doesn't take them seriously.

3. Being overly secretive

It is true that two persons (partners) can live together, but one doesn't know the password to the other's phone. Yes, one might not know the other's whereabout! These are clear signs of mistrust. Some victims make statement such as- "I'm scared that he will not accept me for who I am", "I'm scared he won't let me in", etc. When you hear things like these, know that the trust level between the both of you is low!

4. Picking fights.

We understand the fact that fight in the home can emanate from various root cause. However, if one partner picks up fight with the other all because of just answering phone call, going out to meet with friends, playing with him or her or even using his or her belongings, may point to mistrust. The reason to this is that, those points mentioned above aren't things that should lead to fight, rather, could be settled with few gentle words.

5. Feeling overprotective.

Trust issues may cause you to feel overprotective and hypervigilant. This occurs as a result of zero trust between both parties, making the partners feel not save around the other.

The above points would indicate if you are already having trust issues in your relationship. But you know what? You don't have to panic if that applies to you. Below are magic steps to regaining full trust from your partner:

1. Practice forgiveness

Trying to rebuild trust after a betrayal? forgiveness is crucial! Not only will you need to forgive your partner, but you also may need to forgive yourself. Blaming yourself in some way for what happened can keep you stuck in self-doubt. That can hurt the chances of your relationship’s recovery.

Depending on the betrayal, it might be hard to forgive your partner and move forward. But try to remember that forgiving your partner isn’t saying that what they did was OK.

Rather, you’re motivating yourself to come to terms with what happened and leave it in the past. You’re also giving your partner a chance to learn and grow from their mistakes.

2. Effective Communication

Let me first mention that talking alone is therapeutic. Infect, it is medicinal! Making ample time to talk things out after a broken relationship or trust is key to losing the grudges you both had against each other. This will also facilitate forgiveness amongst you.

3. Forget the past.

After effective communication has taken place and you both have come to agreement, then the sleeping dog should lie! Needles of bringing up the issue in future arguments. Most people can't forgive and forget. Honestly, when you decide to give the relationship a second chance, you’re also deciding to trust your partner again. Maybe you can’t completely trust them right away, but you’re implying you’ll give trust a chance to regrow.

4. Apologize sincerely

There's an adage that says that "a peaceful reply prevents a bloated heart". This means that sincere apologies have a large part to play in the ability of your partner to forgive and forget.  If you cheated, or otherwise damaged your partner’s faith in you, a genuine apology is a good way to start making amends. It’s important to acknowledge you made a mistake.

5. No secretes

How do you trust your partner if you feel some secrets are plaguing your relationship? When building trust in the relationship between you and your partner, transparency is critical. No compromised honesty or secrets if you are learning to trust again.

Trust in marriages or relationships needs openness and honesty. Building trust in a relationship and keeping secrets are mutually exclusive.

6. Not going back

After cool discussion/deliberations as regards the bone of contention that led to the mistrust, it is advisable that you do not go back and repeat same acts again!

For the fact that your partner is able to forgive and forget the past doesn't mean he/she will have the grace to do so for a second time. This is why you need to watch your actions and words. Always know that before any relationship thrive, both parties involved will have to make deliberate and conscious effort for that to be achieved!

In conclusion, it is very possible to revive your relationship after severe damage caused by mistrust. In my words, communication is key! If you follow the above steps carefully, certainly, you will have ample reasons to smile back at your partner again!